I have a scar on my leg and back when I was about 7 or 8 years old I got into trouble playing with a doll I wasn't allowed to use. My Mom was upset and immediately I was punished into doing chores. I went to throw the trash away into a big trash dumpster and I was trying to swing the bag high up but it came back at me and in the bag was the lid from a metal can that sliced into my leg.
My Mom's reaction was "stop crying" its just a cut. I kept bleeding and thank goodness a neighbor, who was also a nurse, took a look and said "she needs to go to the ER". My stay at home Mom had two kids to take care of so fortunately another neighbor was just getting ready to leave on a camping trip with their kids and said they would take my sister with them. So off to the ER we went and I was terrified. As I sat on the ER table there was a table of needles next to me. I was all by myself and not sure where my Mom was. A nurse came over though and rolled her eyes at the needles placed there by someone else and told me I didn't need that. Instead she did a butterfly treatment and wrapped it. I was so relieved and that evening without my sister there I got full attention of my parents. I even got to pick all the toppings on the pizza! Strange how you remember things like that.
Looking at my scar today I remember the story but what I hadn't thought about was how young and inexperienced my Mom was; she was around 27 and really didn't do a great job as a parent but also didn't experience love or compassion from her own childhood. Both my parents came from a time where kids were seen but not heard. You got spanked, punished and often they didn't want to hear excuses. But I also remember the amazing people who did help me during that experience and demonstrated compassion. I witnessed the difference and never forgot what that felt like.
Sometimes we encounter situations we can't change in life but don't dismiss your action. You may not even be aware of who you help. However what do have is the ability to show others what kindness each day. The fact is we all have scars, both inside and out, and we may not be able to prevent the injuries from happening but we certainly can help the recovery.
Pain and recovery is very much what I see from so many who show up for online yoga. Some scars are easily seen but others we hide and it takes so much courage to be open and vulnerable to them. "I see you" (Namaste) is such a powerful word because when we hurt we may look for help but sometimes don't want to be seen. We want hide and be fixed. Yet that approach blocks us from the healing that has to happen.
Right now the classes I offer are more focused on this because many can work-out on their own. Many may have done more flow or vinyasa yoga before the pandemic but now the yoga has to change to meet your wellbeing. "It is the relaxing that I struggle with" one student said to me. Which is why she comes to online release and restore. If you need to heal, rest or undo I hope to see you online with me. Of course times do change which is why Wednesday nights is now Yang/Yin to prepare for the fact that some are in need of more strength in the muscles and the joints.
We all have scars and they are proof we lived and survived but we have to be patient and understand healing will take time. Be kind and offer yourself compassion. I hope you will find this with a balance of joy in your day; self-care, walk in nature, fun activities, talks with friends, and of course yoga.
"Have a good day for no reason!"
---Paige